IDG and NBC: The feet and shoes of the peaceful warrior
We celebrate the variety of connections, interest and heartbeats at the Needs-Based Coaching Institute. Ondine Delavelle, currently involved in the German speaking cohort, is sharing her view on NBCI and how it connects with her new-found "home", the Inner Development Goals.
In 2015, the UN General Assembly agreed upon a shared vision for a future where humanity thrives in harmony with nature, achieving peace and prosperity for all while ensuring the health and sustainability of our planet for future generations. This 2030 vision was expressed in a framework made of 17 targets: the Sustainability Development Goals (SDG). [OD1]
193 countries took part in formulating the goals. Humanity has the tools and knowledge. Still, progress is off track and, at the current pace, less than 20% of the SDG targets are on track to be achieved by 2030.
[OD2] In the face of this disappointing track record, a group of development scholars authored the ”Growth that Matters Manifesto”. This call to action brought thousands of experts to design a framework to address the inner dimension of sustainability: the Inner Development Goals (IDGs). There is a vibrant, growing community around this work, organizing great events to further the change within that will contribute to outer transformation, because business as usual in our complex world will not do it.
Might Needs-Based Coaching, our coaching approach rooted in Nonviolent Communication, contribute to the inner skills and qualities necessary to bridge the gap between the UN intention and the planetary complex reality? In a world of multiple crises and insufficient political will to collaborate on resolving them?
Naming this complexity, I already feel overwhelmed by the vastness of the problems. This is one pattern I observe in myself: I often land in despair and hopelessness and fall into closing my eyes. I don’t want to feel the pain of what we, as humanity, are doing to Mother Earth. But this is not how I want to continue. I want to open my eyes. I want to cry for her and the coming generations. I don’t want to shrink in shame of contributing to this situation; I want to be in service of the future. Discovering the IDGs movement give me the home I needed to grow this spark that has been there for longer. And you, how do you feel when you let yourself be touched by the state of the world? What do you long for?
To grow this fire, I have many companions and I walk different paths, such as NVC and coaching, the Pioneers of change community, as well as more recently my new fellow IDG-Ambassadors. Inner transformation is not a piece of cake, however, in communities we can support and challenge each other and keep going. For example, in coaching, I can realign my inner and outer worlds. I can care for my well-being and inner growth. With my coach’s support, I can surrender into pain and grieve, and I identify what lies behind; how incredibly scary the threat is, and how unmanageable it is to not know what the right thing is to do. I start breathing deeper. I become able to take a small step – such as writing this article - and regain agency. I will trust my path reveals itself as I walk.
Coaching is my scaffold. Recently, I had a serious conflict and brought it to a coaching session. I was surprised where it led me. My body refused to deal with this ugly conflict, while my thoughts pushed me to get it sorted out. Exploring this contradiction, I realized I didn’t want to repeat the eye-for-an-eye paradigm. Tears came, and I realized how much I care for peace. I softened inside. I realized I can care for peace, and this doesn’t mean I should let anyone step on my toes. I can set my boundaries. I am not small, insignificant, and not worth standing up for, I matter and have strengths. From there, I find my voice, and freed from frustration and self-pity, I can contribute to a better world. A whole new perspective became available.
This example relates to the BEING dimension of the IDGs, one of the five dimensions of the Inner Development Goals.
Needs-Based Coaching supports the skills comprised in this dimension:
● Inner Compass: I could relate to my care for peace.
● Integrity and Authenticity: By reminding myself of my values, I could make decisions in line with them.
● Openness and Learning Mindset: I was curious about what was going on. I didn’t suppress it, and I was willing to be vulnerable, which helped me reconnect with what is dear to me.
● Self-Awareness: I was able to self-reflect, connecting with my thoughts, feelings, and longings. The nonviolent roots of Needs-Based Coaching are particularly helpful here.
● Presence: My coach was present and non-judging. This accompaniment was central and important for me to be present with myself.
What is your favorite practice for cultivating BEING skills?
Needs-Based Coaching offers the HOW to work with the Inner Development Goals toward the peaceful, equitable, and prosperous future our hearts know is possible and we all hope for. It enables us to be present, free from past conditioning of staying small or insignificant toward bravely following our heart’s calling, finding our contribution in the big scheme of things.
The SDG and the vision they represent are where we want to go. The Inner Development Goals are the feet of the peaceful warrior. Needs-Based Coaching delivers the shoes, fit for the hike.
The NBCI is entering the IDG movement, and I recently assisted in the IDG Ambassador program. Stay tuned for more on the other four dimensions of inner development (Thinking, Relating, Collaborating, Acting).
Ondine Delavelle
